Cryptonews

Disclosure: The author of this story owns shares in Strategy (MSTR).

When the venerable Michael Saylor, that sage of silicon valleys, confirmed on Strategy’s (MSTR) Q1 2026 earnings call that the company was prepared to sell bitcoin, it was as if a thunderclap had echoed through the halls of Wall Street. Yet, this was no new venture-nay, it was a reprise of the 2022 spectacle, where Strategy, ever the clever fox, sold bitcoin to harvest tax losses, only to buy it back with the grace of a dancer on ice.

Bitcoin is currently exhibiting significant technical momentum. Following its recent recovery of the 50-day and 100-day moving averages, Bitcoin is currently making an effort to break through the psychologically significant $82,000 area. Higher lows have been forming on the daily chart since early April, and the RSI is still above 60, which is usually an indication of persistent bullish pressure rather than fatigue.

Celal Kucuker, a chap who spends his days peering at charts on that infernal contraption called X, has laid out a roadmap that would make even Jeeves raise an eyebrow. On May 9, he proclaimed that Ethereum must first take a tumble to $1,760-$1,800. Rather a nasty spill, but he assures us it’s all part of the plan. Apparently, this is where the old girl will gather herself, dust off her skirts, and prepare for a jolly good rally. From there, he expects a sharp reversal, with the first pit stop at $4,800-just a whisker away from her previous best show in August 2025. Capital!

“The only change I will propose is even stricter penalties.” That remark signals a sterner course, though the full draft will reveal how far the new rules will extend their reach.

Behold, the markets-a theater of the absurd, where numbers dance to the tune of fear and greed. Bitcoin, that fickle tsar of the crypto realm, surged from its slumber at $80,700 to a fleeting glory of $82,400, only to be cast down by the reopening of CME futures and the specter of U.S. equity markets. Such is the fate of the unanchored soul in a world of leveraged bets and geopolitical tantrums.

If you remove the gains made by artificial intelligence stocks, the market’s recent progress largely vanishes, revealing that overall, it hasn’t really moved since February.

ETH is hovering around $2,326, and volume has surged by more than 103%, which in diary terms translates to people finally paying attention after pretending not to notice. Open interest is creeping up, network activity stays respectable, and ETH staking keeps rising-signs that Ethereum may be slipping into a rather confident, accumulation-scented mood before the big move.

BitMEX differs from many crypto exchanges because it primarily focuses on contracts that follow the price of cryptocurrencies, rather than just buying and selling them directly. While BitMEX now offers standard trading, options, and even contracts based on stocks, it’s still best known for its derivatives trading.

The recent collaboration isn’t surprising; it stems from a shared interest in privacy among leaders from the XRP and Solana blockchain communities, despite their historical competition.

According to the May 11 press release, which read like a script for a farce, Capital B issued 23 million shares with attached warrants at €0.66 per ABSA, a figure as precise as a guess in a fog. The offering, reserved for institutional investors across the U.S., Europe, and “other jurisdictions” (read: places where the legal advice was slightly hand-wavy), was subscribed by global investors. Maxim Group, ever the eager footman, acted as lead placement agent, while Marex, with the enthusiasm of a dog with a bone, served as co-manager.