You Won’t Believe How This CEO Is Paid—All In on Bitcoin 🚀💸

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In the gray, electric sprawl of Tokyo—where life flickers behind glass, and ambition presses ever upward—Mr. Takashi Tashiro, a man of no small resource and an inclination toward what the French call l’esprit de contradiction, has found himself bestowed with the helm of Remixpoint, the enigmatic power company. The board, ever fixated on “alignment,” has declared that Tashiro shall be remunerated not in the crusty old yen, but in Bitcoin itself. “To be in the same boat as the shareholders,” went Tuesday’s official statement—though, one might wonder, what happens to those ill-omened vessels once the storm of the markets breaks? ⛵️🪙

Salary, taxes, the whole bureaucratic ménage, shall be converted to the cryptocurrency du jour, and lodged with whatever digital receptacle Tashiro fancies. A fantastical notion, perhaps, but one rooted (or entangled) in their ambition for “shareholder-oriented management”—whatever century that concept hails from. Sarcasm aside, if the boat capsizes, at least the shareholders go down together, pockets jingling with invisible coins (and not a lifeboat in sight).

For the legalists clutching their code of Company Law, there is reassurance: officially, yen will be involved at some arcane stage, lest the Ministry of Finance has a nervous collapse. But—after the requisite shuffling of financial papers—the Bitcoin shall be purchased at the going rate (God help us) and hurled into the designated digital abyss, err, wallet, of our daring new CEO. Such is modern stewardship, apparently.

Let us not forget, Tashiro took command not in some fit of revolutionary zeal, but as part of a sober shift—Remixpoint intends to make BTC the central lodestar of its financial galaxy. Words were uttered about treasury management, but mostly they just want to sound more interesting at cocktail parties.

Even before our protagonist’s arrival, Remixpoint was stacking their digital assets—Bitcoin, Ether, Solana, XRP, Dogecoin—the latter, presumably, as a hedge against boredom. As of June 13, their chest bristled with holdings: 1,051 BTC (for the serious), 901 ETH (for the aspiring aesthetes), nearly 14,000 SOL (for the optimists), over 1.1 million XRP (for those who love litigation), and, just for laughs, a tidy 2.8 million DOGE. The whole lot, rattling around for over $116 million—a sum guaranteed to disturb one’s sleep, if not one’s principles.

On top of his relentless pursuit of innovation—or mild distraction—at Remixpoint, Tashiro finds himself also under the benevolent gaze of BITPoint, a crypto exchange attached to the formidable SBI Group. There, he must contend with the curious phenomenon of President Trump’s memecoin (TRUMP), proving, if nothing else, that modern finance has lost all sense of decorum. 🤡🇺🇸

On the Fad of Crypto Salaries: A Generational Pastime

Remixpoint, as much as they might relish it, are late to the party. Bitcoin salaries have flitted through the business world like an overzealous moth. Argo Blockchain in Britain declared their CEO, Peter Wall, would be paid in BTC; Wall presumably hoping the miners would strike digital gold. NFL player Russell Okung once said he’d get paid in crypto, too—perhaps in the hope the ball would run faster.

And who can forget New York’s own Eric Adams? Proposing, with exuberance, to take his mayoral paychecks in Bitcoin. Now, as he woos voters again, Adams crows about his growing digital nest egg, each Satoshi rising higher as the price of Bitcoin climbs. Cynics may scoff, but who among us hasn’t wanted to gloat about at least one good financial decision? 💼📈

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2025-07-08 21:12