XRP ETF: Next Week’s Launch, A Ripple Swell Spectacle 🎩

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In the gilded parlor of Ripple’s Swell conference, where the air hummed with the electricity of speculative fervor, Steven McClurg-CEO of Canary Capital-deigned to inform the rabble that his XRP ETF would burst forth like a phoenix from regulatory ashes. “We’re poised to unveil this marvel next week,” he declared, as if bestowing a holy relic upon the masses.

Should this miracle materialize, XRP shall ascend to the pantheon of crypto’s elite, rubbing shoulders with Bitcoin and Ethereum. A spot ETF! The golden ticket for Ripple’s devotees, nay, its apostles, to parade their faith in the holy ledger.

McClurg: “XRP Ledger: The Wall Street Slayer”

Oh, but the CEO waxed poetic! The XRP Ledger, he proclaimed, was not mere code but a sabre-clashing against the powdered wigs of Wall Street. “Imagine,” he intoned, “a duelist fencing with the very pillars of finance!”

“The XRP Ledger is financial rails-a challenger to the throne of capital’s bloodsuckers.” 🗡️

Rapture at the ETF discourse!

“XRP Ledger: Wall Street’s undertaker” – Vet_X0 (@Vet_X0) November 4, 2025

The man waxed lyrical about remittances, too! Behold, the migrant worker’s plight-a “8-15% tax on hope,” as he melodramatically dubbed it-would be vanquished by XRPL’s benevolence. A Robin Hood ledger? How quaint.

ETF Filings: A Regulatory Waltz

Canary Capital, though bold, is but one suitor in a crowded ballroom. Franklin Templeton, Bitwise, and their ilk have all scribbled their names on the SEC’s dance card. McClurg, ever the showman, invoked a “no-delay amendment”-a regulatory sleight of hand!-to leapfrog rivals. November 13 looms, a date immune to government shutdowns. How convenient.

The SEC’s new maestro, Paul Atkins, now conducts with a crypto-friendly baton, slashing approval times from 240 to 75 days. A regime change! The dragon, once fire-breathing, now hums lullabies.

Analysts: Billions, You Say?

“The XRP Army,” Bitwise’s Matt Hougan prophesied, “shall smash-buy this ETF!” A revolution in velvet gloves. Bloomberg’s Eric Balchunas, ever the bard, likened the frenzy to a “Cannonball Run”-though one wonders if he meant the original or the 2022 remake. 🚀

“Smash-buy” -@Matt_Hougan

Predicts a billion-dollar fund by Christmas.

“Flows will shock the bourgeoise!”

– NateGeraci (@NateGeraci) October 29, 2025

Ripple’s Chessboard: Global Gambits

Ripple, ever the strategist, deploys its knights: Ripple Prime, GTreasury, Rail, and the RLUSD stablecoin. A kingdom for banks and payment barons. Canada and Brazil, those enlightened realms, already host XRP ETFs. Meanwhile, seven U.S. filings await like suitors at a debutante ball.

And so, if Canary’s clock ticks true, the first U.S. XRP ETF shall dawn within days. A new era! Or as the skeptics whisper: “Caveat emptor.” 😉

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2025-11-05 15:04