In the shadowed corridors of the digital realm, Samson Mow, the architect of JAN3, doth prowl, his voice a thunderclap against the burgeoning might of Ethereum. Behold, the tale of a man who sees not a coin, but a sinner, and a coin, but a saint.
Mow, that paragon of crypto piety, hath once again casteth his scorn upon the second-largest cryptocurrency, a creature he deems unworthy of the title “money.” With the fervor of a prophet, he lauds Bitcoin, the elect, and with a finger of judgment, points to Ethereum, the fallen.
Mow Slams Ethereum as “Not Money”
The chief of JAN3, in a fit of divine indignation, responded to a missive from the Ethereum Foundation, which boasted of a $5,000 sale at $2,049 per token. “What folly!” he cried, “To trade in such tokens, when the true path lies in Bitcoin’s embrace!”
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With a sneer, Mow noted that the Ethereum Foundation would rather sell its own coin than accept it as wages. “No soul among them,” he lamented, “would dare to be paid in ETH. A proof most damning, that Ethereum is but a shadow, not a light.”
But lo, Bitcoin, the golden child, is embraced by all who toil in its realm. “For in Bitcoin, there is trust,” he declared, “while Ethereum, a house of cards, crumbles under its own weight.”
This is how you know Ethereum isn’t money. No one working on Ethereum actually wants to be paid in ETH.
Almost anyone working on Bitcoin at any level (research, protocol, applications, etc) would happily take BTC as payment. In fact it would be preferred.
– Samson Mow (@Excellion) March 19, 2026
To bolster his claim, Mow cited a screenshot from the OpenSats charity, where donations are converted to Bitcoin, a ritual of purity. “A testament,” he proclaimed, “to the sanctity of Bitcoin, and the heresy of Ethereum.”
Important Bitcoin Reminder from JAN3
A day prior, JAN3, that beacon of wisdom, issued a dire warning to the crypto faithful. “Beware the exchanges,” they cried, “for they are but wolves in sheep’s clothing, ready to devour your assets with a single misstep.”
“To trust an exchange,” they warned, “is to trust a stranger with your soul. The only salvation lies in the keys, your own, clutched close to your heart.”
“Learn from the mistakes of others,” the tweet implored, “lest you become the next victim of greed’s cruel game.”
Every time an exchange collapses, thousands of people lose everything.
Trusting an exchange is the same as trusting a stranger.
The only way to ensure no one can take your Bitcoin is for YOU to hold the keys.
Learn from the mistakes of others. Don’t wait to become the victim.
– JAN3 (@JAN3com) March 18, 2026
Bitcoin Price Goes Down Again
And thus, the largest cryptocurrency, that beacon of hope, descended once more, a 6% plunge sending it to the $70,000 abyss. “A trial,” murmured the investors, “for the faithful, a test of resolve.”
Geopolitical storms, those harbingers of chaos, drove the brave from the markets, both Bitcoin and gold trembling under the weight of uncertainty. “A fitting irony,” some mused, “that even the mightiest fall when the winds of fear blow strong.”
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2026-03-19 12:09