Ah, the GENIUS Act—because nothing says “genius” like a law about money that’s literally just magic internet math. 🤷♂️
Paolo Ardoino, Tether’s CEO, seems thrilled about President Trump’s recent signing, calling it a “pivotal milestone.” Translation: Now we can all pretend we understand blockchain while sipping lattes. 🎉 He insists regulation is the key to innovation, which is like saying a jigsaw puzzle is the key to not setting your house on fire. Still, it’s reassuring to know lawmakers are finally catching up to the fact that money can be digital. Or maybe they’re just Googling “blockchain” and copying-pasting the first definition. 🤔
Let’s not forget the U.S. is now positioning itself as a leader in digital finance. Because nothing says “leadership” like a country where I once lost a dollar bill on the sidewalk and it vanished faster than my retirement savings. 😂 Stablecoins, he says, are here to enable global access to dollars and “enhance financial resilience.” I’m assuming this means I can now send money to my cousin in Ohio without the post office stealing it. 🚀
Ardoino also thanked lawmakers for their “constructive engagement,” which I’m sure involved a lot of eye-rolling and side-eye. Tether’s commitment to “rigorous standards” is admirable—just don’t expect them to explain any of it to you without using the word “decentralized.” And hey, if this all goes well, maybe I’ll finally figure out how to split a dinner bill with my friends without everyone pulling out four different apps. 💸
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2025-07-20 02:02