America’s Bitcoin Reserve: Sold, Not Stored!

According to a recent report by Bitcoin Magazine, the U.S. Marshals Service (USMS) may have sold Bitcoin forfeited by the developers of Samourai Wallet, even though an executive order says such Bitcoin should be held, not sold. Because nothing says “strategic reserve” like a last-minute sale to a crypto exchange. 🚀

When Crypto Whales Flock to Binance: A Tale of Greed and Stablecoin Flatlines 🐋💸

Graphs that only make sense to people who use 'hodl' unironically

The average deposit size ballooned from eight to 10 Bitcoin up to a whopping 22 to 26 Bitcoin. Meanwhile, withdrawals shrunk faster than a wool sweater in hot water, with the Exchange Outflow Mean hovering between 5.5 and 8.3 Bitcoin. What does this mean? Well, it seems these crypto kings are less interested in stashing their treasure in cold storage and more interested in leaving it on-platform, ready to trade like a game day jersey on eBay.

Blackrock & Strategy: Bitcoin’s New Bureaucracy? 🚀

Strategy Inc (Nasdaq: MSTR), and Blackrock’s Ishares Bitcoin Trust (IBIT) exchange-traded fund (ETF) entered 2026 with a Bitcoin balance so colossal, it could power a small island nation for a decade. Strategy filed a Form 8-K with the U.S. Securities and Exchange Commission (SEC) on Jan. 5, 2026, detailing new Bitcoin purchases, equity sales, and reserve levels, while Blackrock released updated holdings data for its spot Bitcoin ETF. One might say they’re not just investing-they’re curating.

BNB’s Wild Ride: $1K or Bust? 🚀💸

BNB Price Chart

BNB, the enfant terrible of Binance, hath reclaimed its throne at $900, a feat last witnessed in the halcyon days of December before the cruel hand of fate (or bears) dragged it into the abyss. 🏰💔

Bitmine’s ETH Hoard: 4.14M Tokens and a Vegas Showdown! 🎰💰

Bitmine’s ETH Holdings: Because Why Not?

Well, slap my wallet and call me impressed! Bitmine Immersion Technologies has just announced it’s sitting on a whopping 4.14 million ETH-that’s 3.43% of the entire Ethereum supply. How’d they do it? By scooping up 32,977 ETH in the past week, which is roughly $100 million. Or, as I like to call it, “Tuesday.” 💸

Bitmine: The ETH Hoarder with a Calculator and a Dream 😎💰

Bitmine Immersion Technologies announced on Monday that their total assets-crypto, cash, and equity-now sit at a cool $14.2 billion. Their ethereum stash alone is 4.144 million ETH, which is roughly 3.43% of the circulating supply. Fun fact: they’re basically the Oprah of ETH-“You get some ETH, and you get some ETH, and YOU get some ETH!” 🎁