GBPJPY

Breakout, you see, was a circus of sorts, where traders-armed with nothing but their wits and a borrowed $100,000 (or $200,000 if they juggled multiple accounts!)-could strut their stuff. No need for vulgar personal funds here! Simply pass a test of nerve and cunning, akin to a medieval trial by fire, and voilà: a funded account materializes! Keep 90% of the profits, they said, as if generosity were a virtue in the snakepit of crypto. 🐍

So, here’s the deal: The U.S. job market decided to take August off. Nonfarm payrolls limped along with an embarrassing 22,000 new jobs, far below the forecasted 75,000. And don’t even get me started on June’s revision-it dropped to NEGATIVE 13,000. Yes, negative. As in, fewer jobs than when dinosaurs roamed the Earth. 🦖📉

This is just splendid news for the more fanciful folk in the crypto realm; it means that mainstream adoption is strutting about, proving $BTC’s worth as a reserve asset and sprinkling confidence dust over other digital currencies like confetti at a birthday party. 🎉

Apparently, this wedge thing is historically bullish, but first, it might crash. Classic Solana, can’t do anything straightforward. 🌪️ And the bears? They’re having a party at the $200 level, rejecting Solana like it’s last season’s fashion. 👎

According to Mr. Yakovenko, Solana is not just a blockchain; it’s a high-speed train that never stops for the scenery. In August 2025, this technological marvel processed a whopping 2.9 billion transactions. Now, let’s put this into perspective: Ethereum (ETH), the granddaddy of blockchains, has only managed to hit the same 2.9 billion transactions since it first saw the light of day back in 2015. That’s right, folks, Solana did in one month what Ethereum took years to accomplish. 🤯

At the tender sum of $25, Avalanche trades with a volume of nearly $700 million, which is quite respectable for something that recently took a modest 2% tumble. It seems that $27 is the equivalent of that door at the country club no one can open. Since March, AVAX has been politely rebuffed like an eager debutante refused dance after dance.

Bitwise research analyst Danny Nelson (whose deductive powers would have left Sherlock Holmes shredded in envy) made a cryptic pronouncement this Thursday: “Pokémon and other trading card games (TCGs) are about to have their ‘Polymarket moment.’” Translation: crypto nerds may soon have a reason to fight over shiny cardboard that isn’t just an NFT of a potato in a hat.

Indeed, FalconX-having secured a respectable domicile in the United States-proffers a web of services surrounding the mercantile, derivative, and custodial custody for their institutional constellation. Today, they broadcast their not-insignificant support for Ethena’s synthetic stablecoin, USDe, delivering a set of luxuries to institutional users, including:

On September 4th, this little arrangement was announced with all the fanfare one might expect from two entities eager to reshape global finance. Soon enough, Breakout’s evaluation-first philosophy will cozy up inside Kraken Pro like an overachieving houseguest. But don’t worry-it promises to bring more than just awkward small talk. 😉

Apparently, altcoins like ETH and XRP get their value from usefulness – you know, actual things people do, like sending money across borders-assuming anyone still remembers how to send snail mail.