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While some white hats eventually took it upon themselves to steal the funds for temporary safekeeping, many more hesitated over fears that getting involved could land them in prison. 🚔👮♂️

The payments giant, Visa, is announcing this pilot for Visa Direct, their so-called real-time global payments platform. It happened at some Sibos thing in 2025 – who even knows what that is? Anyway, businesses can now prefund these cross-border payments with stablecoins, those cryptocurrencies pretending they’re tied to real money. Ha, stable? Right. 😂

And get this, the shenanigans unraveled back in 2021, but hey, better late than never for our plucky crime-busters. This bad boy’s staring down a potential 20 years behind bars, like a real-life episode of “Law & Order” gone awfully wrong. 🙄

In a twist that could make your head spin faster than a hamster on a wheel, Brock decided to lay down over a million bucks to support none other than New York’s own Mayor Eric Adams-just days before Adams hopped off the political rollercoaster and said, “Adios!” 🏇💸

EURCV, USDCV go live on Morpho Vaults With a bow to modernity and a dash of spectacle, the vaults spring to life, pairs trading is in the air, and liquidity hums like a lute in the hands of a clever servant. SG-FORGE has officially stepped out of the ivory tower and into DeFi’s innovative sphere-where contracts, not clerks, run the purse, and the coffee is metered by gas fees. Parbleu!

The ever-optimistic Mirko Zhao, the founder of Cronos Labs, confirmed this exciting news in a press release on September 30th. The goal? To snatch up some tokenization market share, naturally, by luring developers and making on-chain transaction data accessible via AWS Public Blockchain Data. Seems simple enough, right?

Consider the manner of his acquisition: 5.07 million tokens procured at a modest average of $16.23 each, now dwindling to a mere 77,089 tokens – a small shoal valued at $3.37 million-hardly enough to buy a horse, let alone a fine carriage.

This plan is still in its infancy, but it could let investors buy and sell stock tokens-essentially, blockchain-based stand-ins for shares in real companies-on approved crypto platforms. So, instead of trying to get through the maze of traditional stock markets, you could just tap away at your crypto exchange, pretending to trade real stocks. How quaint.

Essential services, bless their weary souls, shall lumber on, like ghosts haunting a deserted mansion. Yet, should this prolonged closure take hold, federal agencies might collapse into a somber silence, and the financial markets-oh those wild beasts-will dance madly in disarray, much to the delight and despair of onlookers, as reported by the ever-watchful BBC.

In den USA spitzt sich ein alter Konflikt zu: Ohne eine Einigung über den Haushalt droht der Regierung ab Ende September das Geld auszugehen – eine Vorstellung, die selbst für Hollywood zu absurd wäre. Passiert das, müssen viele Ämter ihre Arbeit einstellen. Man spricht dann von einem „Shutdown“, einem Wort, das so klingt, als hätte es Elon Musk erfunden. Betroffen wären auch statistische Behörden, die regelmäßig wichtige Wirtschaftsdaten liefern – oder zumindest so tun, als würden sie es. 📉