Meanwhile, Ethereum products shed $422.3 million-earning themselves second prize for Worst Outflow Day Ever (congrats?). Fidelity’s FETH and Grayscale’s ETHE were basically arm-wrestling to see who could lose more money first. Spoiler alert: neither won because we all lost.
He’s taken to X (yes, still calling it that-no matter how many times it confuses your grandma) with a message that’s as inspiring as a motivational poster in a dentist’s office: “Ignore the ₿ears.” Because when life gives you bears, just tell them to take a hike. 🐻🚶♂️
Enter stage left: Dan Ives, Wedbush Securities’ global head of technology research, a man who probably dreams in binary and eats AI for breakfast. He tells CNBC, with great seriousness and probably a slightly smug smile, that the tech sector is basically off to the races. Meanwhile, the rest of us are still waiting for our smart fridge to recognize avocados. 🥑
As per Reuters, the Middle Kingdom is now toying with Yuan-backed stablecoins, a game of financial chess to elevate its currency’s global standing. Hong Kong and Shanghai, ever the trendsetters, are leading the charge, while Asia’s other players polish their own stablecoin strategies. One can only imagine the tea leaves being stirred in Beijing. 🍵
And timing! Bitcoin’s price is currently doing its best impression of a sinking ship, trading below $114,000. Not $124k. Not even $115k. $113,269. Because nothing says “confidence” like losing 7% of your value in a week. 📉✨
In case you missed the memo, Shiba Inu isn’t just playing around with governance. They’ve snagged $12 million from industry big shots and are making a push for a new Layer-3 chain. This is their master plan for dominating the Web3 space, or at least making a dent in it. Think of it as their “we’ve arrived” moment. 🚀
Like the proverbial calm before the storm, the broader crypto market is quietly hinting at what could become a full-fledged altseason. The culprit? Bitcoin dominance (BTC.D) taking a little tumble. After months of gallant upward movement, it’s broken below its recent uptrend. This, dear reader, is when things start to get interesting. Historically, this is when liquidity escapes from Bitcoin and heads straight into the waiting arms of altcoins.
Perhaps reminiscent of a classic Western showdown, this zone has multiple retests, suggesting the market’s grand poker face might crack soon enough. This could, if the stars align and the Bitcoin gods smile upon us, lead to a double-bottom formation – think of it as Pi Network’s version of a hug, signaling that perhaps the worst is behind us. Signs of accumulation are flickering like streetlights in a thunderstorm, hinting that a rebound might be just around the corner, possibly up to a glorious $0.70. Fancy that? 🤑
In a move that unites wild ambition with the rustic charm of cattle ranchers, Wyoming has waltzed into the grand ballroom of stablecoins, clutching its very own digital dollar with the ferocity of a debutante clutching pearls.
On Wednesday, Bitcoin (BTC) decided to take a little dip to $112,565, briefly flirting with a two-week low last seen on August 3. Because who doesn’t love a good rollercoaster ride in the world of crypto? (Note: sarcasm included for your convenience.)
