According to Shibburn, in the last 24 hours, 715,893 SHIB tokens were burned, a significantly smaller amount compared to the days when millions of SHIB tokens were burned. Oh, how the mighty have fallen! 🤔
Officials in Moscow are waving their big, bureaucratic fists and shouting, “Crypto? As money? Ha! That’s as likely as a bear riding a bicycle.” Anatoly Aksakov, the wise owl of the State Duma, says digital assets simply don’t fit into Russia’s strict legal puzzle. So, no crypto cash register ringing! 🛑🦅
So, HashKey Holdings, the crypto exchange that’s basically the cool kid in Hong Kong, made its Stock Exchange debut on Wednesday. 🎉 Raised $206 million in its IPO. Not too shabby, right? Priced shares at HK$6.68, which is basically the “I’m fancy but not too fancy” of pricing ranges.
Ah, digital assets-those delightful enigmas that have evolved from mere tokens to Byzantine financial contraptions. Staking, DeFi, airdrops, NFTs-each more confounding than the last, like guests at a particularly disastrous garden party. Regulators, bless their bureaucratic hearts, still cling to Howey like a drowning man to a lifebuoy, while the rest of us drown in liquidity pools.
On Tuesday, Visa revealed it’s now letting US financial institutions settle transactions in USDC. Because who wouldn’t want to move money faster over blockchains, seven days a week, while somehow managing to keep the consumer experience “unchanged”? It’s like magic, but with more fees and less magic. ✨
Apparently, people who bought a lot of it a long time ago aren’t panicking. Which either means they’re incredibly prescient, or they have a really good poker face. Or maybe they’re just extremely stubborn. It’s hard to tell with these things.
The bank, in a gesture of apparent novelty, has deigned to bestow its favorable attention upon two digital asset treasuries connected to the protocol, signifying, it seems, a new willingness amongst those on Wall Street to assess the worth of this decentralized exchange infrastructure. One wonders if it is genuine interest, or merely a desire to be seen as au courant.
So, here’s the tea: U.S. lawmakers are sweating bullets as crypto capital and innovation threaten to ghost the country. Enter Senator Mike Crapo from Idaho (yes, potatoes and crypto!), who’s basically shouting, “We need to fix this now!” in his Dec. 15 column. 🗞️
The initiative, darling, is designed to shepherd banks, fintechs, and merchants-those poor, bewildered souls-through the labyrinth of stablecoins. Payments? Treasury operations? Business processes? Oh, the excitement! It’s like teaching your grandmother to twerk-necessary? Debatable. Entertaining? Absolutely.
“We want stablecoins to be good money, like bank notes or money on deposit at banks,” proclaimed Governor Tiff Macklem during a rather spirited gathering of the Montreal Chamber of Commerce on Tuesday. One can almost picture him atop a podium, delivering this proclamation with all the fervor of a Shakespearean actor. 🎭
