Mysterious Vanishing of Satoshi’s Statue: A Crypto Comedy of Manners!

It is a truth universally acknowledged, that a cryptocurrency community in possession of a Satoshi statue must be in want of drama. Thus, the recent unlooked-for disappearance of said monument in Lugano hath set tongues wagging from Tokyo to Texas 🕵️♂️.

In a gesture of peculiar modern patriotism, the Plan B consortium—ever eager to blend civic pride with blockchain fervor—erected this marble homage to Bitcoin’s ghostly patriarch last October. Little did they know, the specter of absurdist art theft was afoot! 🎭

Rumors now swirl like tulips in a storm 🌪️, with concerned citizens and meme lords alike speculating: was it spirited away by a rogue band of Ethereum maximalists? Or did Satoshi himself return, displeased by the $113,583 price tag? 🤑

Enter Sir Adam Back, knight-errant of cryptography, who quipped upon the digital agora:

“Satoshi hath vanished. Once more!”

— @adam3us, purveyor of cheek, August 2nd, 2025

A remark met with equal parts eye-rolls and hearty chuckles across the decentralized realm. 😂

Let us pause to recall that Satoshi Nakamoto, that most elusive of digital hermits, withdrew from public life with the utmost discretion in 2011. His farewell missive, a cryptic “Pray trouble me no further,” hath haunted journalists and theorists ever since. 📜

The enduring mythos of a missing man

Though statues of Satoshi sprout like wildflowers in improbable places (Fornelli! Tokyo! Next, perhaps, the moon? 🌕), the Lugano likeness clearly lacked sufficient chains. Or perhaps it simply grew weary of selfie-seeking tourists.

Mark your calendars! The 15th anniversary of Satoshi’s immortal words—“If thou doubtest me, I shall not deign to persuade thee, apologies profuse”—was celebrated with the solemnity owed to a prophet who foresaw Bitcoin at $0.07. Imagine his thoughts now! 🙃

And lo, the cryptocurrency that once traded for pocket change now rubs shoulders with gold and bonds, embraced by institutions who’ve traded their scepticism for ETFs. How the mighty have capitulated! 🏦✨

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2025-08-03 13:02