Cryptonews

Gemini’s decree permits mortals to pledge their DOGE, SHIB, or XRP as tribute for GUSD perpetual contracts—a ritual once reserved for BTC and ETH aristocracy. XRP and Solana, the well-behaved children, received a mere 15% haircut (a trim, not a scalping), while Doge and Shiba Inu, the rowdy jesters, were clipped by 30%. Volatility, it seems, demands sacrifice. 🐕🔥

So, after that dramatic rejection at $316, our darling AAVE decided to have a little tantrum, pulling back into what traders affectionately call the “point of control” (POC)—the price level that acts like a sticky tab of support. But beware! If this level crumbles like a soggy biscuit, all eyes turn to $227—the fortress of bullish signals and technical charm where multiple support lines conspire together.

Mesdames et messieurs, vous croyez que le combat entre Ripple et l’empoisonnée SEC est terminé? Ah, que nenni! Figures-vous que maître Bill Morgan, ce savant avocat américain, a déclaré tout haut que la malicieuse SEC n’a point encore baissé les armes. Non, elle joue encore ses tours, car elle n’a point déposé son papier de retraite. Une étape fatidique est fixée pour le 15 août — comme une date dans une pièce où tout peut basculer, ou pas!

Ether runs into resistance at $4,000, but strong technicals and rising institutional demand could drive ETH into price discovery. 🧠

But wait, here’s the twist—beyond its unpredictable price tantrums, Shiba Inu is changing its stripes. Think of it as a meme that’s decided to grow up and get a proper job. Turns out, a shocking 80% of all SHIB is now hoarded by long-term investors, those noble souls holding onto their tokens for over a year, rather like Grandma clinging to her retirement savings—slow and steady. This data from IntoTheBlock reveals that, despite the wild price swings, the number of long-term holders is actually increasing. Who knew that people could be patient? Less trading chaos means fewer sudden dumps, and that’s a good thing, like a peace treaty in the wild west of crypto. Less volatility, less drama—who knew stability could be so dull and yet so comforting?

If you’re a BBVA customer now, congratulations! You can buy and sell crypto right inside your mobile app. No more sketchy websites, no more calling that cousin who “knows a guy.” You just tap a few buttons and voilà—digital coins. Next thing you know, your grandfather’s trading Dogecoin instead of checking his retirement account.

On the 29th of July, the SEC, in a moment of uncharacteristic generosity, granted permission for in-kind creations and redemptions for spot crypto ETPs (exchange-traded products). How thrilling! 🎉

Just last week, in a scene reminiscent of a farcical play, Trump graced the Fed with his presence, questioning Chairman Jerome Powell about the extravagant renovations that seem to have spiraled out of control. “Why, dear Jerome, are we spending so much?” he might as well have exclaimed, while simultaneously reiterating his fervent calls for the FOMC to cut rates. A cut, he believes, would not only benefit Bitcoin and its cryptocurrency brethren but also breathe life into the languishing equities, igniting the flames of economic activity across the land. 💸

Let’s talk numbers, because who doesn’t love a good financial drama? Long position traders got slapped hard, losing a whopping $651,250! It’s like watching your favorite character in an action movie get tossed out of a window—suspenseful, shocking, yet somehow incredibly satisfying. 💰💣