Vitalik Buterin Sells 3,000 ETH Amid Market Dip Over the last three days, Vitalik Buterin has been selling off around $6.6 million worth of Ether (ETH), roughly 2,961.5 coins, at an average price of $2,228 each, and is still in the process of selling. Records of his transactions show he’s converting the ETH into stablecoins … Read more
In a move that’s less shocking than your ex’s sudden interest in crypto, the U.S. Commodity Futures Trading Commission (CFTC) has finally ditched its 2024 draft rule that would’ve banned betting on political events. Yes, you read that right-no more “Who’ll win the election?” pools at the office. Or, wait, actually, yes. Back to the pools!
Dare I say, the fourth quarter was particularly unkind, as it bared its fangs, biting with a ferocity that resulted in a net loss of $482 million! What a delightful surprise for the shareholders, n’est-ce pas? Their precious crypto holdings have taken quite the nosedive, much like a bird who forgot how to fly.
Bitmine, under Lee’s stewardship, has amassed unrealized losses of $5.85 billion on ETH, having purchased at an average price of $3,650. The current market price? A humble $2,300. But hey, who needs green when you can have hope?
The recent losses-oh, the drama!-have accumulated over recent months, leaving our beloved cryptocurrency languishing far beneath its gloriously lofty peak, igniting yet another round of spirited debate about whether the bullish parade has finally come to a halt.
Yet, as if orchestrated by some mischievous spirit, while the hashrate soared to dizzying heights, miner profitability decided to plummet like a lead balloon. The result? A mining industry that is not only larger and more industrialized than ever but also more exposed to the whimsical price risks than any soap opera diva on a bad hair day.
As I pen these words, the price of copper dances around $6.01-$6.05 per pound, a slight tumble from its dizzying $6.31 peak reached on January 29, 2026. That peak was a celebration, a brief moment of jubilation before reality came knocking, much like my neighbor’s cat demanding food at 3 AM. It was a significant rise, yet it fell short of the inflation-adjusted highs of 2008-oh, how we love to reminisce about the past!
In a mere span of 25 minutes, Bitcoin plummeted by nearly $1,900, which is enough to make even the most stoic investor clutch their pearls. It wiped out around $70 million in long positions faster than a jackrabbit can hop. But wait! Just moments later, it bounced back by over $1,200, sending another $15 million in short positions to an early retirement. Talk about a rollercoaster ride without the safety harness!
In a world where Bitcoin is increasingly throwing itself into the chaotic embrace of software stocks, one can’t help but snicker. Its latest correction seems to be perfectly synchronized with the broader software sell-off-how charming!
In a CNBC broadcast, wires buzzing with the hungry gossip of money, John Blank pronounces that the flagship crypto asset may yet be dragged down to roughly half its proud height.
