Cryptonews

Now, Weisberger isn’t just throwing shade for fun. He says, straight up, that the reason people invest in assets is because they expect them to grow and because they’ve got a solid reason for that belief. For Bitcoin, that reason is simple: it’s the “sound money” for the digital age, replacing gold, which has been kind of lost at sea since 1913 (thanks a lot, 1971). Bitcoin doesn’t need to rely on anyone’s word; it’s backed by a vast network of node operators. Gold? Well, you trust the people who say they’ve got it. Big difference.

On-chain data, as confirmed by Glassnode, reveals a most extraordinary spike. This profit-taking, though, hath occurred even as the price recovered to above $2.50. A most curious divergence, indicating a rude market struggle between sellers and new institutional demands. 🕵️‍♀️📉

CoreWeave’s (CRWV) downtrend has worsened after the company warned that data centre delays would impact its fourth-quarter results. Who knew? 🧙‍♂️

On Monday, the Senate-those grand architects of compromise-approved a funding package, inching closer to ending the shutdown. “Hours, not days,” crooned Senate Majority Leader John Thune, his optimism as hollow as a politician’s apology. Yet, the Bitcoin ETFs yawned, their inflows a meager $1.2 million, according to Farside Investors. A pittance! A drop in the ocean of greed! 🌊💰

Bitcoin, that stubborn mule, tried to gallop past $107,000 but tripped over its own hooves-local traders are muttering about the folly.

Ah, the $BTC price. It’s in the middle of a “corrective impulse,” which, let’s be honest, sounds like a term invented by someone who couldn’t think of anything less exciting. Ahem, moving on. It’s been inching along sideways, like a tired train refusing to leave the station. If the bulls can somehow muster the strength to keep up their, erm, “effort,” we might eventually see an upward shift, which-if all goes well-could result in a slightly higher high.

In the briefest of time frames-42 minutes to be exact-half a million dollars shuffled through Bitget, and now investigators are wondering whether this moment exposed one of the country’s most audacious memecoin frauds. Can you smell the scandal brewing?

The Central Bank of Brazil, in a move as sudden as a surprise party, has finalized regulations that would make even the most seasoned stockbroker blush with embarrassment, ensuring that virtual asset service providers (VASPs) and stablecoin transactions are now as tightly controlled as a mischievous terrier on a leash.

Oh, the noble Bitcoin, now hovering near the sumptuous $105,300, though it has taken a slight dip of 0.8% in the past day, and a more significant 5% this month. Yet, this week appears surprisingly stable. After a brief descent to the humble $100,000, Bitcoin has managed to bounce back, even as the sell pressure escalates with the vigor of a thousand knights! 🧙‍♂️💸