After weeks of refusing to do much of anything except maybe stare at its own reflection, DOGE finally decided to break free from that tidy triangle formation. Thanks to analyst Ali Martinez, we now know this rebellion could send prices south of the border to a charming $0.17. Because what’s more fun than watching your investment drop? 😅
In a tête-à-tête with Bloomberg TV, Novogratz, with the air of a man who has glimpsed the cosmos, proclaimed the stablecoin saga is but in its infancy. “An explosion, my dear fellow,” he intoned, “is nigh upon us, whether in a year or a quinquennium.” 🌋⏳
Oh, sweet summer child! The EF claims this fire sale is to fund “research, grants, and donations” – because obviously, the best way to advance innovation is to slowly suffocate the market with a thousand tiny trades. 🐍 They’ve promised to split the sales into “smaller orders” to “reduce market impact.” Sure, Jan. We believe you. Like tossing confetti off a skyscraper won’t make a mess. 🎉
Update: Venus Protocol has been fully restored, with withdrawals and liquidations all spruced up as of 9:58PM UTC. Cheers! 🍸
And lo and behold, the lost millions were recovered under Venus’ watchful eye. The stuff of legends! ✅
See, the fancy legislation called the CLARITY Act was supposed to bring order to the wild, wild west of cryptocurrencies. Think stablecoins and all that jazz. But noooo, along comes WLFI and throws a spanner in the works-like a monkey with a calculator. 🐒🤡
more printing to pay for past printing. One might suggest a touch more fiscal responsibility, but one wouldn’t expect to be heard. The world, it seems, is content to dance on the brink of financial chaos. Pass the bonbons. 🥂 Read More 2025-09-03 09:20
El Salvador is gearing up to host Bitcoin Histórico, the world’s first state-backed Bitcoin conference, on 12-13 November at the Centro Histórico in San Salvador. Yes, you heard that right: a government-sponsored love letter to Bitcoin. Because nothing says “financial revolution” like PowerPoint presentations in a historic venue.
The metric in question, a curious alchemy of the short-term holder market-value-to-realized-value ratio and Bollinger Bands, seeks to measure when the newest coins-those shiny, untested treasures-are trading at a price that makes one question their life choices. In Frank’s chart, the STH-MVRV Bollinger oscillator hath dipped into the “oversold” realm, a place where sellers have exhausted their tears and buyers have exhausted their wallets. A true romantic’s paradise. 💔
Key Support levels: $185 – the fortress of solace for weary traders.
XRP clings to $2.70 like a child to a teddy, then parades above $2.80 with the swagger of a man who just won a bet. Bitcoin and Ethereum nod in approval, but let’s not forget: this is crypto. Nothing is ever “safe.”