According to Hal (who clearly has a PhD in “I’m Definitely Not a Scammer”), if you throw $3,700 at Litecoin and wait for it to drop to $30, you could theoretically sell it at $9,000 and… poof! You’re a millionaire! 🎉 But let’s be real, this is about as reliable as a toddler with a calculator. 🤡
On this fateful day of the 31st of October, hath the founder acknowledged the chasm betwixt Cardano’s humble DeFi feats and the soaring pinnacles of giants like Ethereum and Solana, yet with a philosophic shrug, declared that mere numbers doth not unveil the soul of participation nor the iron grip of governance-ah, the irony of it all, for who knew crypto could mimic the soul-searching of a Russian novel? 😏
October treated bitcoin miners with a meager $1.595 billion in revenue – a mere pittance compared to their dreams of wealth. Most of it came from the block subsidy, as if the blockchain were a miserly landlord. 🏠💸
Trade filings from late October (yes, the same month when everyone else was carving pumpkins 🎃) reveal that ARK Innovation (ARKK), ARK Next Generation Internet (ARKW), and ARK Fintech Innovation (ARKF) all decided to pile onto the Bullish bandwagon. Collectively, they scooped up over 100,000 shares, marking ARK’s third shopping spree since Bullish’s NYSE debut. Because, you know, why stop at one wave when you can have a tsunami? 🌊
The XRP community stands at the precipice of destiny, eagerly awaiting the grand unveiling of Canary Capital’s XRP ETF, tentatively scheduled for November 13, 2025. Hark! Months of nail-biting suspense have led us here, one must wonder if the universe itself has conspired in our favor.
XRP transfers between accounts have drastically decreased, according to metrics from over 700 million daily transactions at the beginning of October to about 230 million by the end of the month. It’s like watching your favorite TV show get canceled after one season. 📺💥
Despite all the fanfare, ETH’s still actin’ like it’s at a funeral, tradin’ below key EMAs with more gloom than a Twain novel. Bears are havin’ a field day, bless their hearts. 🐻
In the latest episode, Luca, our oracle of technical doom and hope, reveals Ethereum’s recent dalliance with the high-resistance zone – the famed ‘golden pocket’ between Fibonacci levels. Spoiler alert: the price was politely shown the door and retreated into the green comfort zone, a rallying ground, or perhaps just a glorified support cushion. This zone, lovingly called the Weekly Bull Market Support Band, has been a reliable totem for reversals, like a good luck charm that now whispers, “Something’s not quite right, mate.”
