Ah, the stablecoin market! It expands like the tormented soul of a man who has lost his purpose, yet clings to the illusion of progress. From $200 billion at the dawn of 2025 to $280 billion by Thursday-a mere blip in the grand farce of finance. Citi, that august oracle of numbers, has revised its 2030 forecast to $1.9 trillion (base case) and $4 trillion (bull case), as if the future were a dice roll in a tavern of fools. 🕰️💸
The White House, ever the patient gardener of governance, has turned its gaze to these candidates after President Trump’s initial choice, Brian Quintenz, found himself entangled in Senate red tape. Sommers and Hauptman, it seems, are paragons of crypto-friendliness, though one wonders if their “pro-innovation” stance is born of wisdom or simply a desire to avoid being left behind in the digital gold rush. 🏦✨
Short-term? Bearish as a grumpy old man. But hold your horses-liquidation clusters and Binance’s buying sprees? They’re like seeds in the soil, waiting for rain. 🌧️
The scene is set: Ohio, eager to leap into the swirling abyss, joins Colorado and Utah-those brave pioneers of financial anarchy-who have already signed away the last semblance of old-fashioned currency. Louisiana, not to be left behind in this circus of future folly, has earlier passed a law to dance with blockchain’s ghostly waltz. 🎠
Crypto sage EGRAG CRYPTO, with the flourish of a stage director, sketches a scenario wherein XRP might flirt with the range of $15 to $33 by the twilight of 2025. His chart, that coquettish diagram, shows XRP often waltzing along an ascending channel in the final act of each bullish pageant. This slender corridor, a sort of velvet corridor of anticipation, has historically served as a quiet alcove of accumulation before a rapture of upward motion. 💃
The market freak-out after President Milei’s political stumble was, predictably, short-lived. Enter the U.S., stage right, waving its magic money wand ✨. Because why let a sovereign nation suffer when you can just… print more dollars?
M2 Capital Limited, the investment sidekick of the UAE’s M2 Holdings, has just dropped a cool $20 million on Ethena’s governance token, ENA. This grand gesture highlights a noble quest to link Middle Eastern investors to shiny, new digital asset infrastructure. You know, because why not join the global finance party a little late? 🥳
The oracle known as Sykodelic foresaw a descent even further, to perhaps $3,900 in the weeks to come, while doubters courageously whisper of $3,500. “The abyss of Bitcoin is here,” he declared, a cryptic echo, “And Ethereum is nigh on falling into a pitchesque abyss similar to that of yesteryear’s June.” Sykodelic, enigmatic sage of the trends, forebodes a settling $3,900, assuaging us to lay down in wait with calm hearts until such reckoning.
Targeted for launch in the latter half of 2026, which, if you’re keeping track, is exactly 42 years after the invention of the wheel. The stablecoin will offer a strong European alternative to US dollar-based stablecoins, enhancing the region’s digital payment system through blockchain technology for improved efficiency and transparency. Or, as the EU might put it, “We’ve finally managed to make something that works, but only if you ignore the fact that it’s 2026 and we’re still using blockchain.” 🚀
