Bitcoin’s Wild Gold Mirror: $644K Crash or Cash? 😱

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<a href="https://usdaed.com/btc-usd/">Bitcoin</a>‘s Shocking <a href="https://jpygbp.com/gold">Gold</a> Twin: $644K Rally Incoming? 😂

Ah, behold the restless soul of humanity, dear reader, forever chasing shadows in the marketplace of illusions! These Deutsche Bank analysts, with their feverish scribblings, proclaim parallels between the yellow god of gold and the enigmatic serpent of Bitcoin, both surging like tormented spirits in this year of fiscal phantoms. Other soothsayers, drunk on bullish delusions, predict the crypto’s ascent, whispering that it apes the precious metal’s whims as investors, those wretched gamblers, flock to the ‘debasement trade’-a mockery of Sicherheit in times of chaos. 😂

Deutsche Bank Draws Parallels Between Gold And Bitcoin

In the labyrinth of a Deutsche Bank report, we glimpse the analysts’ tortured visions: just as central banks once hoarded gold like miserly ghosts in the 20th century, guarding against the tempests of inflation, so now they eye Bitcoin with covetous gazes. Oh, the irony, the cruel symmetry! BTC scales new peaks this year, much like gold breaching $4,000 an ounce, its first such folly this month. Can one not see the human folly herein? 💸 Sarcasm aside, policymakers murmur of BTC as a reserve alongside gold, a digital alchemist’s trick. By 2030, they prophesy, central banks might amass it, earning BTC the scornful epithet ‘Digital gold.’ Investors, those eternal fools chasing hedges against macroeconomic doom, pile in, mocking the ‘debasement trade’ ignited by the U.S. government’s absurd shutdown. Analyst Holger Zschaepitz, with a smirk unbecoming a sage, notes BTC tailing gold to highs above $125,000-a milestone in this debasing farce, shielding from currency’s creeping death.

Yet, the analyst adds, delivering wisdom with the subtlety of a sledgehammer, this mirrors gold’s slow dance, investors seeking solace from fiat’s inevitable decay. Meanwhile, crypto pundit Merlijn, ever the dramatic, decrees that BTC follows gold’s lead in every macro eruption, soaring parabolically thereafter. If history repeats its cruel joke, he predicts $160,000 looms, echoing JPMorgan’s undervaluation hymn-$165,000 by year’s end, oh the absurdity! 😏

BTC Could Reach $644,000 Based on Gold Correlation

VanEck’s Head, thatemptyset Sigel, utters a prophecy from the abyss: post-halving in 2028, Bitcoin might claw to half gold’s market cap, implying a ludicrous $644,000-gold’s $27 trillion behemoth dwarfing BTC’s paltry $2.2 trillion. Half gold’s value, he muses philosophically, stems from its hoarded virtue, not mere trinkets or tools. Surveys reveal the young in emerging realms preferring Bitcoin’s rebellious glow over gold’s ancient creak, a generational rebellion brewing. SkyBridge’s CEO Anthony Scaramucci, with the wisdom of a tragedian, foresees younger souls ascending to power, shifting vaults from gold’s grave to BTC’s electrified dream. 🚀 Ah, what follies we mortals pursue in our quest for eternal value!

At this penned moment, Bitcoin hovers at $112,500, dipping in the last 24 hours-a fleeting sorrow amidst the charts, per CoinMarketCap’s cold gaze.



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2025-10-11 23:34