Bitcoin Hoarder Strikes Again: 17,994 BTC Bought at Probably the Wrong Time!

by

Oh, Strategy (aka the company that used to be called MicroStrategy, but let’s face it, no one’s got time for that many syllables these days) is at it again! On March 9, they decided the world needed another headline about their Bitcoin obsession, so they chucked 17,994 BTC into their already overflowing piggy bank. That’s $1.28 billion, darling, at a cool $70,964 per coin. Because, you know, who needs a diversified portfolio when you can just yell “HODL!” into the void?

This little shopping spree marks their 102nd Bitcoin buy (yes, you read that right) and their 11th consecutive weekly purchase in 2026. At this rate, they’re basically the Bitcoin version of those people who buy every limited-edition sneaker drop. Except instead of sneakers, it’s digital coins. And instead of wearing them, they just… sit on them. Literally.

So, Strategy now owns a whopping 738,731 BTC, which they’ve accumulated for a tidy $54.77 billion. Their average cost per coin? A breezy $75,985. Meanwhile, Bitcoin’s current price is lounging in the mid-$66,000 range, meaning their treasury’s market value is somewhere between “ouch” and “why didn’t we sell when we had the chance?” But hey, paper losses are just a state of mind, right?

Michael Saylor: The Bitcoin Evangelist with a Side of Drama

Executive Chairman Michael Saylor-aka the man who’s never met a Bitcoin dip he didn’t want to marry-is still preaching the gospel of Bitcoin as the ultimate reserve asset. Cash? Bonds? Pfft. Those are for amateurs. Strategy’s been busy capitalizing on every dip like it’s Black Friday at Target, using equity offerings and their fancy Series A Perpetual Stretch Preferred Stock (STRC) to fund their habit. Because nothing says “financial prudence” like leveraging your company to buy volatile assets.

And don’t worry, they’re not done yet. With STRC shares and equity programs still humming along, Strategy’s got enough firepower to keep buying Bitcoin like it’s going out of style. Or, you know, crashing. Again.

According to BitcoinTreasury.NET, Strategy now owns a mind-boggling 3.4% of all Bitcoin in existence. That’s right-they’re basically the Bitcoin equivalent of that one friend who always orders too much food and then can’t finish it. But hey, at least they’re inspiring other institutions to jump on the bandwagon. Or, as critics would say, the sinking ship.

Bitcoin’s Death Cross: Because Nothing Says “Buy the Dip” Like a Bearish Pattern

Oh, and did we mention the timing of this latest purchase? It just so happens to coincide with Bitcoin’s latest drama: a classic death cross on the 3-day chart. That’s when the 50-day moving average dips below the 200-day, and it’s basically the financial equivalent of a horror movie jump scare. The last time this happened? 2022. And we all remember how that ended.

The Crypto Fear & Greed Index is currently screaming “extreme fear,” and with geopolitical tensions hotter than a Kardashian Instagram post, it’s not exactly a great time to be a Bitcoin bull. But hey, Strategy’s clearly not one to let a little thing like a potential 45-52% drawdown get in the way of their vision.

So, here’s to Strategy-the company that’s either a genius or a cautionary tale. Only time will tell. But in the meantime, pass the popcorn. This is going to be entertaining.

Read More

2026-03-09 15:00