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Pelin Ay (@PelinayPA), that high priestess of charts, declares FLOKI ensnared in an “upward channel,” a phrase as grandiose as it is dubious. The 0.618 Fibonacci retracement level, she proclaims, is its lifeline-a thread separating triumph from oblivion. 🕸️ Yet, what is this but a modern alchemy, where numbers are transmuted into prophecy? The RSI, neither hot nor cold, lingers in its tepid neutrality, a shrug of the shoulders from the market gods. 🦵 Will FLOKI bounce, or shall it crumble like a poorly baked pie? The answer, my friend, is blowing in the volatile winds of crypto. 🌪️

On August 26, the city’s six virtual asset ETFs traded HK$56.4 million ($7.2 million). Not too shabby, considering the market has mood swings that make a toddler on sugar look stable.

Elsewhere in the crypto menagerie, the futures bazaar is booming, with Ethereum and Solana also scratching at the door, weighing in at that magic $1 billion mark. But guess who’s sprinting ahead with the energy of a cashier at closing time? XRP! Yes, the token beloved by institutional suits with pockets deeper than Margarita’s philosophical monologues.

Richard Teng, Binance’s CEO (or as I like to call him, the crypto cowboy in a digital Wild West), took to X (formerly Twitter, if you still remember what that was) to deliver a PSA that sounds suspiciously like an episode from “Things That Make You Say ‘Really?’”

The custodians of marble halls (aka stock exchanges) demand regulators exorcise these “tokenized stocks”-spectral mimics that haunt gray zones, siphoning substance from the living. 💀

The global market cap, that proud titan, slumped 1.27% to $3.81 trillion, a mere shadow of its former glory. 🏛️ Bitcoin, that once-mighty colossus, dipped below $110,000, trading at $109,986 with $79.8 billion in turnover. A tragic fall for the king of coins! ⚔️

Oh, Solana (SOL), once the darling of the digital realm, has seen its value tumble by 3.55% since yesterday. What a fall from grace! 😂

CryptoBirb, that modern-day Cassandra, crows from his digital perch, proclaiming that the end is nigh-a mere 60 days of growth remain. “Behold,” he squawks, “the cycle is 93% complete, a marathon of 1,007 days drawing to its inevitable close.” His words, like stones cast into a still pond, send ripples through the market, where the Cycle Peak Countdown indicator ticks relentlessly toward zero. ⏳

This is just info. Not financial advice. Don’t throw all your yen into crypto without thinking it through. Coindoo.com won’t babysit your wallet – do your research and maybe talk to a real human advisor before making moves.

This latest speculatory spree, conducted in the dog days of August, elevates their total hoard to a rather more impressive-sounding 3,670 BTC, each unit acquired at the eminently reasonable average price of a small suburban villa. The corporate mind, it seems, operates on a different plane, seeing not volatility and hype, but a “key resource for the future of the internet.” One wonders if they have also invested in picks and shovels for the digital gold rush.