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So, picture this: at 10 a.m. Eastern on Monday, the OANDA data via TradingView reported an ounce of shiny gold flirting with $3,635. Just a hot minute earlier, at 9:46 a.m., it hit its peak moment of fame at $3,637 – like, lifetime achievement award level. This isn’t some random blip; it’s the perfect storm of economic chaos, political drama, and the usual financial shenanigans that make gold the cool, calm, and collected safe-haven everyone loves when the world’s a mess.

Privacy, a virtue often sought after in a world where every action is scrutinized, continues to be a paramount concern for crypto holders. On a Monday, the 8th of September, the Litecoin Foundation and AmericanFortress made a joint announcement, which crypto.news has the honor to report exclusively. The AmericanFortress Litecoin Wallet, set to enter its beta phase, promises to be a sanctuary for those who wish to stake and leverage layer-2 solutions while keeping their financial activities as private as a lady’s diary.

BitMine Immersion Technologies (BMNR), in its infinite wisdom-or perhaps boundless hubris-has proclaimed its crypto holdings now approach $9 billion. This places them second only to Strategy (MSTR), whose 638,460 BTC are worth over $71 billion. Truly, one must marvel at such numbers, even as one questions their sanity. 🤔

In a post on X, Sun couldn’t resist a bit of theatrics: “Ladies and gentlemen, the decentralized stablecoin USDD has officially landed on Ethereum! A new era dawns where everyone can enjoy the decentralized delights of stablecoins! USDD is not just growing; it’s positively thriving! Swap for USDD and dive into our mining activities with up to 12% APY – a veritable treasure trove of opportunities!”

On a Monday that could easily be confused with any other, they pledged allegiance anew to Hyperliquid, that decentralized exchange platform whose fame spreads faster than a fever in a cramped railway carriage. Lion Group – a company juggling over-the-counter stocks, options, and futures with the carefree dexterity of a street juggler – will reassign all its Solana (SOL) and Sui (SUI) tokens to this promising new venture, as if sending old soldiers off to a different war.

Bonk (Bonk), a name that echoes with the absurdity of existence, has found critical support at the Golden Pocket Fibonacci retracement-a region fortified by daily structure and the mystical 0.618 Fibonacci retracement. This bounce, a fleeting moment of triumph, confirms the ongoing bullish market structure, positioning BONK for a continuation higher if resistance is reclaimed with the vigor of a volume-supported charge. Adding to its momentum, Coinbase, that modern-day arbiter of financial fate, has officially listed Bonk as eligible collateral for perpetual futures trading, thereby enhancing its visibility in the derivatives market. A small victory, perhaps, but one that stirs the soul. 🏛️

Now, along comes Forward Industries Inc., swaggering in and dumping a $1.65 billion heap-mostly cash and shiny stablecoins-onto Solana’s porch. If you find your jaw anywhere near the floor, don’t bother with the broom, it ain’t coming back up soon. This sort of business is what passes for “a small bet” among institutional folks, and suddenly Solana is hotter than a Mississippi steamboat furnace in July.

After what one imagines was an utterly riveting registration process with India’s Financial Intelligence Unit (doubtless involving more paperwork than a vicar’s funeral), Bybit is now rolling out the red carpet for features galore: spot, derivatives, options, copy trading… one half expects them to offer trading in tea and crumpets next! 🍵

Crypto price rallies are like that one flaky friend – exciting for a hot minute, then poof, gone. But hacks? Oh, they’re the party crashers that never get bored. Meet Nemo, the DeFi yield protocol who learned this the hard way.