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And so it came to pass, as though from the pages of a melodramatic novel, that Sheikh Ahmed bin Saeed Al Maktoum, chairman of the grand Emirates, with a flourish of pen and the gossamer promise of progress, inked a deal with Crypto.com and the fabled keepers of perfume and Toblerone, Dubai Duty Free. Travelers henceforth may venture skywards or descend upon duty-free for their inevitable shopping spree—all through the mysterious, mystical means of crypto.

According to the illustrious blockchain analytics firm Sentora, miner-related transactions now constitute a mere 3.3% of total Bitcoin volume—a precipitous decline from the halcyon days of last year when miners occasionally contributed over 20%. The current level, reminiscent of the late 2022 market nadir, suggests a broader slowdown in miner-driven activity. One might say, the miners are taking a well-deserved siesta, perhaps to ponder the meaning of their existence in a world that increasingly values digital tokens over tangible assets.

And lo, the rate of Cardano (ADA), that most wondrous of cryptocurrencies, has risen by a staggering 2.23% over the last 24 hours 🚀. One can almost hear the champagne corks popping and the joyous whoops of the investors as they gaze upon their swelling portfolios 🎉.

Kinetiq, ever the diplomatic ex, issued a statement about their considerate early notice—seven-day unstaking delay and all that jazz—so everyone could presumably set their alarms and calmly move their tokens. Honestly, who are we kidding? The whales were already halfway out the door, sunglasses on, Uber waiting, prepping for Kinetiq’s sparkling new features.

But analysts are worried about the mismatch between the buzz and Ethereum’s price action.

One of the key players in this Ethereum fan club is – you guessed it – institutional investors 🤑. They’re increasingly seeing ETH as the “digital gold” of the crypto world (because who needs actual gold when you can have a digital version, am I right? 💁‍♀️) and adding it to their investment portfolios like it’s going out of style.

This sudden burst of energy comes as the network gears up for the long-awaited Heimdall v1 to v2 migration on its mainnet. In a tweet that could only be described as a digital pep talk, Polygon co-founder and newly appointed Polygon Foundation CEO Sandeep Nailwal confirmed that the upgrade will go live on July 10. 📢

Analysts at Bitfinex have suggested that the pause in Bitcoin’s rally is due to a growing sense of uncertainty among investors. Buyers, it seems, are reluctant to push the price higher without stronger catalysts or clearer signals from the broader economic landscape. This hesitancy has resulted in muted demand at current price levels, keeping Bitcoin from breaking out.

As we gaze upon the daily chart, we behold a sight most wondrous: Ethereum consolidating above key moving averages, like a majestic eagle soaring above the fray 🦅. The 50, 100, and 200-day MAs, those stalwart sentinels of market momentum, stand stacked below price action, providing layered support, like a loyal entourage guarding their star 🤝. And though the RSI has remained in the neutral-to-bullish zone, a tantalizing 57, there’s still plenty of room for ETH to run, like a debutante at her first ball, before it becomes overbought 💃.

And so, they set out to raise a small fortune, a trifling SEK 516 million (~$54M), via share and convertible debenture issues. Because what’s a health tech firm without a Bitcoin treasury strategy, am I right? 💸