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Now, you may have heard whispers that the 4-year cycle of Bitcoin, a tradition as ancient as the hills, had been shattered into a million pieces. This cycle, dear reader, is tied to the mystical halving events, where every four years, the block rewards for miners are cut in half, leading to much gnashing of teeth and rending of garments. However, these halvings are not just about the miners; they’re the heralds of a new bull market, much like the arrival of spring after a long, cold winter.

Litecoin [LTC], bless its little heart, has managed a rather spirited 42.4% rally in a mere month. Quite the show, wouldn’t you agree? Bitcoin [BTC] and Ethereum [ETH] have also been putting on airs, up 14.6% and 56% respectively. Ethereum’s recent exuberance has certainly injected a bit of misplaced confidence into the altcoin market. Heavens, the market cap is hovering around $1.5 trillion—a tidy $401 billion (36%) added since June 20th. Rather vulgar, really. 💸

The House of Representatives, in a flurry of activity, has passed three monumental bills aimed at taming the wild beast that is digital assets. A pivotal moment, indeed, but do not hold your breath for immediate changes, for these legislative whims are likely to take their sweet time coming into effect.

After a winter that felt longer than a Missouri drought, DeFi’s finally warming up! Could be the summer heat’s got somethin’ to do with it, or maybe Ethereum’s just playin’ kingmaker again, who knows?

After a steady recovery from the June lows—probably just trying to find its socks—WLD is flirting with a critical resistance zone at around $1.19. This line has been like that one stubborn relative who refuses to leave the party, since late 2023. Breaking above it could catapult WLD up to $3.07—that’s about 154% if you’re into that kind of thing. Think of it as the crypto version of “you go, girl!” 💃

Among the reasons that RLUSD has been given this number one position is because of its good reserves. According to the report released by Bluechip, RLUSD reserves are secure and well taken care of. They consist of the US Treasuries and bank deposits. This renders the stablecoin a low-risk coin. 🧾

The man declares with the confidence of a flamboyant peacock that these apps, which dance merrily with stablecoins, shall soon besiege the very heart of the payments system that has long relied on those noble knights Visa and Mastercard—who, mind you, charge an alarming fee of nearly 3% for their gallant services. Perish the thought! 🏰💸

Indeed, this figure is but a shadow of earlier grandiose estimates which proclaimed the existence of nearly 200,000 BTC, leaving many to ponder if the agency had been playing a rather complex game of hide-and-seek with its own treasures. One imagines a scene reminiscent of a Russian literary work, replete with intrigue and perhaps a touch of bureaucratic farce.

Ah, the altcoin usurped Tether’s throne, claiming the third spot in this carnival of currencies, its market cap swelling to $208 billion, a bloated beast fed by whispers and wires, where numbers dance like shadows in Plato’s cave.

XRPunkie, with the gravity of a soothsayer and the precision of a charlatan, points to a symmetrical triangle—a pattern as ancient as the pyramids, yet as reliable as a politician’s promise. This geometric marvel, stretching back to 2017, is said to herald great movements. But is it not the nature of triangles to confine, rather than liberate? 🧐 Nevertheless, our intrepid analyst declares a breakout, as if XRP has burst forth from its crystalline prison, ready to conquer the world. Or perhaps, it is merely stretching its legs after a long slumber. 🦥