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Glassnode, that oracle of on-chain wisdom, reveals a holder retention rate of 96%, a figure as steadfast as a Wildean wit at a dinner party. Over the past thirty days, this metric has ascended like a debutante at her first ball, indicating that holders are not merely holding but accumulating-a testament to their unshakable faith. Santiment, ever the corroborator, confirms that investors continue to amass Shiba Inu, even as the price waltzes downward. With 1.53 million holders, one might say the coin has more admirers than a scandalous novel. 📈

Bruno Skvorc, a developer relations specialist at Polygon, has raised his voice against the tide, accusing WLFI of theft. His tokens, he claims, have been unjustly locked away, and the reason? An email from WLFI’s compliance team deemed his wallet “high risk” due to his blockchain activities. One cannot help but chuckle at the irony of a world where the very technology meant to democratize finance is wielded like a weapon by the elite.

And just when everyone’s losing their minds, ADA pops up 5%. Yeah, that’s right. The sell-off driven by frustration might’ve just… I don’t know… hit a bottom? Crazy. 🙃

And lo, the charts conspire with the kind of bullish choreography that would make a ballroom dancer envious: a crisp W-bottom breakout pirouetting into the embrace of a cup-and-handle, brewed over eons looking suspiciously like months. Ah, Q4 of 2025-expect fireworks, or at least a champagne cork pop.

“Community concerns? We hear them, like a distant storm,” WLFI tweets, with the solemnity of a monk. “Transparency first! We intervene only to protect, never to silence… 🦅”

The accuser, none other than the ever-vigilant Stern Drew, a self-proclaimed sleuth from the XRP community, decided to play detective. Armed with XRPScan and a relentless thirst for drama, Drew claims Coinbase’s actions are all too convenient, especially when it comes to those big sales of XRP that conveniently coincide with price dips. According to Drew, Coinbase slashed its XRP stash by a whopping 70%, neatly routing sales through various wallets during off-peak hours. Sounds like something straight out of a spy novel, doesn’t it?

The SEC’s Office of Inspector General (OIG), in a document as thick as a Tolstoy novel, has detailed the findings of its review into the Office of Information Technology’s (IOT) actions that culminated in the loss of former SEC Chairman Gary Gensler’s text messages spanning 2022 to 2023. It seems, dear reader, that the IT department, in its infinite wisdom, decided to implement a “poorly understood and automated policy” in August 2023, which resulted in the complete erasure of Gensler’s government-issued mobile device. 📱💥

Ripple’s strategy is simple enough: Partner up with fintech giants who already have millions of users. That way, they get instant access to retail and business flows without having to do the whole “build trust from scratch” thing. It’s kind of like crashing a party where everyone already knows your name. And apparently, the plan is working-Ham Serunjogi, the CEO of Chipper Cash, claims RLUSD is “uniquely positioned to accelerate institutional blockchain adoption across Africa and beyond.” In other words, it’s not really meant for the average Joe; Ripple’s eyeing the big bucks-banks, institutions, and giant payment firms.

The great saga of expansion unfolds, as MultiversX stretched its arms to embrace Sui, proclaiming this the grand “next stage” of xMoney’s destiny. One might hear whispers in dimly lit rooms: “The future shall not be chained to one chain,” they said. The new XMN token debuted at a hopeful ten cents, with a value stretched wide across a billion-no, ten billion tokens, like stars scattered carelessly across the firmament.

The Toronto-based company isn’t ditching its Canadian roots-it’ll still trade under “HODL” on the Canadian Securities Exchange (because patriotism?). But it’s saying goodbye to the OTC Market, where it previously traded as “CYFRF” (because who doesn’t love a good acronym?). Current shareholders, relax-your shares will magically transform into Nasdaq-listed ones. Poof! 🎩✨