What to know:
- With the tender innocence of a country lad eyeing the first telegram post in his village, Lingerie Fighting Championships intends to embrace the future — $230,000 of bitcoin in these very first 30 days, and a grand sum of $2 million over half a year. Will the rubles of old smile, or will they, as ever, shrug in silence?
- The bitcoin foray coincides with these enterprising dames crossing the Channel for their first U.K. soirees: a London event on July 4 now as unreachable as my youth, sold out to the last button. 🍾
- One’s heart trembles at the company’s refusal to explicate its newfound faith in bitcoin. We enquired, but only cool emptiness responded — such is the poetry of business.
The world has seen many oddities, but Thursday brought a scene worthy of Gogol: global firms aping Michael Saylor’s digital coin stratagem, as if Sisyphus had swapped his boulder for the blockchain.
And so the Lingerie Fighting Championships (forever BOTY in the vast Las Vegas expanse), our valiant troupe of women’s MMA, proclaims: $230,000 in bitcoin now, and then, with a pause for vodka and contemplation, $2 million sprinkled over the coming six months.
Strange coincidence, you say? As if fate herself pulled the thread: Bitcoin is in, and LFC’s English debut stares us down. LFC43: Sindependence Day 2, July 4, London: not a single seat remains unspoken for. If this continues, Wales (with LFC44: Underground Knockouts, July 6) may soon find its sheep replaced by spectators. 🐑🥊
The firm’s press release — as spare and enigmatic as a Russian nobleman’s diary — tells nothing. Yet, CEO Shaun Donnelly, stirred perhaps by the ghosts of Pushkin and poor Ivan himself, whispers to CoinDesk: bitcoin’s future is “levels never seen before.” Imagination! Audacity! Or perhaps simply excellent PR.
In Donnelly’s words: “While we aren’t able to purchase a large amount I looked at it like real estate — even if it’s only a small starter home it’s better to be in the market than outside wishing you had gotten in when you could have.” The lament of latecomers echoes from Wall Street to my aunt’s dacha.
Some bitcoin treasurers have put away childish things (read: their entire prior business schemes) to “identify” solely as BTC companies, living on hope and hashtags. One can only envy their faith, or worry for their investors.
The Lingerie Fighting Championships, meanwhile, may be taking a leaf from Tesla’s little black book: convert a bit of cash, call it a revolution, and perhaps get Musk to tweet about it. Stranger things have happened — see: my uncle Boris’ ill-fated attempt to grow bananas in Siberia.
UPDATE (June 26, 19:10PM): Donnelly’s words now grace this tale, adding just a touch of insight, like a lemon wedge in one’s tea. 🍋
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2025-06-26 23:05