South Korea Ditches Crypto Ban – Corporate Chaos Ensues! 🎭💰

Behold! The Financial Services Commission (FSC) of South Korea, in a move as dramatic as a third-act plot twist, has decreed that listed companies and professional investors may now dabble in cryptocurrencies. 🎩✨

Thus ends a nine-year prohibition more stubborn than a Molière miser clutching his gold. This grand gesture aligns with the government’s “2026 Economic Growth Strategy,” a title so bureaucratic it could put Tartuffe to sleep. Last week’s announcements about stablecoins and ETFs were merely the appetizer-now comes the main course!

The Corporate Investment Farce 🎭

Under these new guidelines-revealed by local media with the fanfare of a court herald-corporations may invest up to 5% of their equity capital annually. But hold your horses, dear speculators! Only the top-20 cryptocurrencies on Korea’s five major exchanges are deemed worthy. How very… selective. 🧐

Some 3,500 entities, from publicly listed firms to professional investors, shall soon join the crypto carnival. As for stablecoins like USDT? The regulators are still debating-presumably over tea and existential dread. Exchanges, meanwhile, must implement “staggered execution” (a phrase as thrilling as a tax audit).

A Market Built on Retail Folly 🎪

Since 2017, when authorities banned institutional participation (citing money laundering fears, as if traditional finance is spotless), Korea’s crypto market has been a retail circus. Nearly 100% of trading activity comes from individual investors-amateurs chasing riches like characters in a French farce. Meanwhile, $52 billion fled offshore, proving that capital, like a clever servant, always finds a way.

Contrast this with mature markets, where institutions dominate like aristocrats at a ball. Coinbase reported over 80% institutional volume in early 2024. Will Korea’s new rules spark a won-pegged stablecoin or Bitcoin ETFs? The audience leans forward…

Industry Grumbles (As Expected) 🤡

The 5% investment cap has drawn ire sharper than a satirical quip. Critics note that the US, Japan, Hong Kong, and the EU impose no such limits-because why stifle ambition when you can let corporations gamble freely? Some warn Korea risks falling behind, a fate worse than a poorly reviewed play.

“Excessive crypto regulations could leave Korea in the dust,” lamented one industry official, no doubt clutching a handkerchief in despair.

Curtain Call 🎬

The FSC promises final guidelines by January or February-timed with the Digital Asset Basic Act’s grand entrance in Q1 2025. Corporate trading should begin by year’s end. Will it be a triumph or tragedy? Stay tuned, dear spectators!

Cryptocurrency chaos
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2026-01-12 05:08