In a universe where the laws of physics are just suggestions and the stock market is a rollercoaster with no safety harness, Michael Saylor, the guy who probably thinks Bitcoin is the answer to life, the universe, and everything (except maybe the question), has declared that Bitcoin will hit $150,000 by 2025. 🚀💰
“I think these 12 months have probably been the best 12 months in the history of the industry,” Saylor said, as if the industry isn’t just a bunch of people trying to make money while pretending they’re not. 🤷♂️ CNBC, ever the reliable source of truth, reported this. 📺
Saylor cited the Securities and Exchange Commission (SEC) embracing tokenized securities, which is like saying ‘yes, we’ll regulate this’ while everyone’s still trying to figure out what ‘tokenized securities’ actually means. And US Treasury Secretary Scott Bessent endorsing stablecoins to protect dollar dominance-because nothing says ‘trust us’ like a government official saying ‘we’re here to help, really.’ 💸
“Our expectation right now is that by the end of the year, it should be about $150,000, and that’s the consensus of the equity analysts who cover our company and the Bitcoin industry.”
The forecast comes amid depressed crypto asset prices, following a market crash that was ignited by US President Donald Trump announcing 100% additional tariffs on China, sparking investor fears of macroeconomic instability. Because nothing says ‘economic stability’ like a president who’s more of a ‘chaos engineer’ than a leader. 🇺🇸🇨🇳
Investors and analysts are hopeful for a market turnaround on positive trade news
October’s historic market crash was due to short-term technical factors, leaving the long-term market trend of higher crypto prices intact, analysts at The Kobeissi Letter said, adding that they were confident a US-China trade deal would be reached. Because, obviously, the market is just a bunch of people playing chess with their savings. 🎲
In the following weeks, officials from both countries softened their rhetoric, signaling easing trade tensions and a willingness to negotiate a deal. Because, you know, nothing brings nations together like a good old-fashioned trade deal. 🤝
Trump reversed course and confirmed that he would meet with China’s President Xi Jinping at the Asia-Pacific Economic Cooperation (APEC) summit in Seoul, South Korea, on Friday. Because, apparently, the only thing more unpredictable than the stock market is the president’s schedule. 🗓️
Bessent said on Sunday that the US and China have reached a “substantial” trade deal framework, an announcement that was celebrated by analysts, investors, and crypto industry executives. Because nothing brings people together like a trade deal that’s as real as a unicorn. 🦄
“Asset prices will get crazy this week if the US-China trade deal is announced and the Fed cuts interest rates. Buckle up,” investor and analyst Anthony Pompliano said. Because, obviously, the market is just a rollercoaster, and we’re all just passengers with no seatbelts. 🎢
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2025-10-29 22:01