Feds Nab $13B Bitcoin Hoard – A Tale of Hacks, Hiding, and Hilarious Hypocrisy 🤡

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In a masterclass of bureaucratic sleight of hand, the U.S. government has quietly claimed 127,271 BTC (valued at $13.7 billion) from the Lubian wallets, a digital treasure trove once guarded by a Chinese fugitive named Chen Zhi. Analyst Emmett Gallic, armed with a keyboard and a healthy dose of skepticism, first unearthed this fiscal farce.

U.S. Quietly Bagged 127,000 BTC Stash in 2024

The world’s collective jaw dropped when the U.S. government revealed it had seized 127,271 BTC from Chen Zhi’s “Prince Group” scam, a financial Ponzi scheme so elaborate it could’ve been scripted by a 19th-century con artist. Meanwhile, onchain sleuths are tracing the money trail back to Lubian.com, a defunct mining pool prosecutors claim was funded by ill-gotten gains-a digital alibi as flimsy as a paper wallet in a hurricane.

But the real drama? How did the feds acquire the keys to this digital kingdom? The Treasury and DOJ unveiled the operation with the subtlety of a sledgehammer, announcing their seizure in July 2024. The wallets, however, were linked to Lubian.com, a pool Arkham Intelligence described as “a ghost town with a $13B skeleton in the closet.”

Screenshot of the U.S. government’s forfeiture.gov notice posted Oct. 16, 2025. Because nothing says “transparency” like a PDF.

Enter Emmett Gallic, the crypto world’s resident detective, who dropped a bombshell on X: the forfeiture.gov notice confirmed the seizure occurred in July 2024. “Who was the Hacker?” Gallic mused, as if the U.S. government needed a LinkedIn profile to take credit for a 2020 hack. Turns out, Lubian’s wallets were compromised due to “poorly generated addresses”-a security flaw so basic it makes a Caesar cipher look sophisticated.

“Who was the Hacker?”

The forfeiture notice, published on Oct. 16, 2025, offers a 60-day window for anyone with “legitimate claims” to file paperwork. For the uninitiated, this is government-speak for “We’ll keep your stolen money unless you scream loudly enough.” If you dare contest the seizure, prepare for a legal gauntlet where your only reward is a fine and a lifetime of bureaucratic nightmares.

Seizing assets, whether cash or crypto, is a bureaucratic ballet: announce the theft, let the public gasp, then sit back and wait for the rightful owner (who’s probably already fleeing the country) to object. In this case, the 127,271 BTC is as “legally contested” as a tax return.

Still, the question remains: how did the feds bypass Lubian’s defenses? Was it a rogue miner with a grudge, a bored intern with root access, or a government agency so desperate for revenue it resorted to cryptocurrency heists? The mystery deepens, like a blockchain riddle solved only by the next block’s timestamp.

FAQ đź’ˇ

  • When Did the Feds Finally Nab the Bitcoin?
    Analyst Emmett Gallic revealed the seizure happened in July 2024, though the notice was filed in October 2025. Because nothing says “urgency” like a three-year delay.
  • Who’s Behind the Seized Lubian Wallets?
    Chen Zhi and his “Prince Group,” a scam network so audacious it could’ve been a Netflix series. Bonus points for the name: “Prince” Group? Really?
  • How Did They Track the Bitcoin?
    Onchain detectives linked the wallets to Lubian.com, a mining pool Arkham Intelligence described as “defunct but still rich.” Classic.
  • Why the 60-Day Notice?
    Federal law requires giving claimants a chance to object. In practice, this means the government gets to keep the money while pretending it’s fair. 🎉

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2025-10-17 01:38