Crypto ETFs: October Madness?! 🤯

Right. So, October. Apparently, it’s been officially declared “ETF month” by someone – probably a very enthusiastic accountant. The US Securities and Exchange Commission, a body whose primary function appears to be delaying things until the very last possible moment, is finally poised to make decisions on a frankly alarming 16 crypto ETFs. Sixteen! As if we didn’t have enough things to worry about. 🙄

These ETFs aren’t just about Bitcoin, oh no. We’re talking about a whole menagerie of digital whatsits: Solana (SOL), the slightly more sensible cousin of Dogecoin (DOGE – yes, that Dogecoin 🐕), XRP (XRP), Litecoin (LTC), and…well, you get the idea. It’s a crypto party, and everyone’s invited – even the ones you’re not entirely sure should be.

First up for judgment? Canary’s Litecoin ETF, due on October 2nd. Then it’s Grayscale’s attempts to convince people Solana and Litecoin are worth trusting on Oct 10th, culminating in WisdomTree’s XRP fund hitting the SEC overlords’ desks on Oct 24th. This all according to James Seyffart of Bloomberg, who probably hasn’t slept properly since 2017.

The decision could arrive any time before these dates, which, when you think about it, is profoundly unhelpful. It’s like being told a potentially universe-altering event will happen…sometime. Thanks, guys. Very precise.

Bitfinex, a group of analysts who clearly haven’t been paying attention to the last decade, are predicting this could spark a whole new “altcoin season.” Which, let’s be honest, is just a fancy way of saying “more complicated charts and slightly irrational exuberance.” They suggest these ETFs offer exposure with “less risk.” Right. And unicorns offer reliable transport.

‘Enormous’ next few weeks in ETFs

Nate Geraci, a man who clearly enjoys hyperbole, declared the next few weeks “Enormous” on X (formerly known as Twitter, in case you’ve been living under a rock…or perhaps just avoiding social media, a perfectly reasonable choice). He’s right; it’s either going to be enormous, or… largely unremarkable. Probability heavily favors the latter.

He added that the SEC can approve things “whenever,” which confirms what we already knew: the SEC operates on a temporal plane entirely divorced from our own.

Meanwhile, someone named Daan Crypto Trades has correctly observed that Fidelity and BlackRock, the big guns in this particular digital arms race, are suspiciously absent from the October deadline list. Perhaps they’re taking a nap. Or plotting something. It’s hard to say.

Seyffart, bless his sleep-deprived soul, estimates a 90% chance of approval for these things sometime in 2025. Which, mathematically speaking, gives them a 10% chance of just…not happening. Don’t spend all your money at once.

SEC makes approvals easier going forward

The SEC, in a rare display of competence (or perhaps just a desperate attempt to clear their backlog), seems to be streamlining the approval process. They’ve adjusted listing standards, which apparently means it’s easier to launch spot crypto ETFs. It’s like deciding to pave the road to… well, to where exactly? The digital wilds? 🤷‍♀️

Eric Balchunas, another ETF enthusiast, points out there are 22 coins on Coinbase with futures that might also eventually become ETFs. Twenty-two! It’s getting crowded in here.

Hashdex, in the meanwhile, has gone ahead and expanded *their* ETF to include XRP, Solana and Stellar (XLM), presumably because why not? At this point, the universe is just throwing random crypto names into a hat and seeing what sticks.

2025-09-29 09:32

‘Enormous’ next few weeks in ETFs

SEC makes approvals easier going forward

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