Crypto Chaos Incoming? 😱

Right then, listen up! This week is absolutely crammed with wobbly things happening, things that could send the whole financial world – yes, even the cryptocurrency bits – into a proper tizzy. It’s all a bit like balancing a stack of pancakes on a grumpy badger, really. One wrong move and…splat! Any silly surprises in the numbers, or if that Jerome Powell chap says something particularly peculiar, things could get bouncy. Very bouncy. 🎢

A Right Mess of Events This Week

September 23: Old Mr. Powell is going to have a little chat at the Greater Providence Chamber of Commerce. Honestly, you’d think he’d have better things to do. He’ll be rambling on about the ‘economic outlook’ (whatever that is) and how to keep prices from zooming up like rockets while also making sure everyone has a job. It’s a tricky business, you see. A very tricky business indeed. It’s like trying to teach a cat to do algebra.

September 24: Some busybodies at the U.S. Census Bureau (a bunch of number-crunchers if ever you saw one) and the Department of Housing and Urban Development are going to reveal how many new houses were sold in August. Apparently, this tells us if everyone is feeling cheerful enough to buy bricks and mortar. If they aren’t, well, that’s a bit of a pickle. 🥒

September 25: They’re digging up the US Q2 2025 GDP data. More numbers! They’ll be peering at sales figures and prices, and generally trying to decide if the economy is doing a little jig or a mournful shuffle. Last time, it grew at 3.3% – which sounds rather impressive, but truthfully, I haven’t the foggiest what that means. 🤷

September 26: The August 2025 Personal Consumption Expenditures (PCE) is coming out, and get this – it’s all about *inflation*. It’s basically tracking how much your sweets are costing you. Last time it was 2.6% to 2.9% – outrageous! 🍬 The price of chocolate biscuits is a national scandal, I tell you!

Why Should You Care?

All this fuss decides if the USA is wobbly on its feet or standing nice and firm. Wobbles mean trouble for the stock market, trouble for those funny digital coins, trouble for your job…the works! That Mr. Powell said recently that the US economy wasn’t doing too badly, growing along at 1.5% with only 4.3% of people jobless. He also muttered something about the job market being a bit too lively and needing to calm down! (Honestly, the cheek!)

Now, everyone’s holding their breath to see what Mr. Powell says next. Will he promise sunshine and rainbows, or will he predict gloom and doom? Only time, and a generous helping of statistics, will tell. 🧐

2025-09-22 12:22

A Right Mess of Events This Week

Why Should You Care?

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