⚠️🪖“Shy-Ba” Doge Army Routed! Funding Trench Runs Blood-Red! 😱

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Comrade Investor-so you believed a smiling canine printed on a zero-laden token could outmaneuver the iron laws of mathematics and history? 🐶📉

In the Gulag of charts, Shiba Inu’s candlesticks now march in lockstep toward the abyss, twenty percent lighter than the fleeting summit of this very moon-cycle. A 3.65 % drop on the nineteenth of August, the day the whole crypto kolkhoz was ordered to dig deeper trenches: $0.00001263-the price of a half-eaten sunflower seed. 🌻

  • The coin itself has been forced to kneel in the formation the chart-wizards call head-and-shoulders. A formation as ominous as the silhouette of three frozen prisoners against the taiga sky. ❄️
  • Funding rate-minus 0.0074 %. Negative, comrade; the shorts now exact tribute from the longs. Every tick is a bayonet to the ribs of hope.
  • $1.15 million worth of SHIB herded onto exchanges, bleating like goats driven to the slaughterhouse.

Whales, those mythical leviathans once whispered about in Telegram channels, remain motionless-61.7 billion tokens frozen like the corpses in permafrost. They neither accumulate nor divest; they simply exist, indifferent to the squeals below. Meanwhile the daily volume limps to a mere $204 million, overshadowed even by the clownish battalions of Pepe and Dogwifhat. 🫡

Technical Tribunal

Observe the daily scaffold:

  • Beneath the 50- and 200-day Exponential Moving Averages, the token lies shackled in the cellar.
  • The neckline-$0.00001027-waits like a frozen river, promising a bath for anyone foolish enough to break the surface.
  • The MACD hovers at zero, the Relative Strength Index under fifty: both indicators, like exhausted guards, too tired to lift a truncheon.

Comrade, if you still clutch these tokens in trembling hands, consider this: in the great ledger of life, even zeros can be erased. The next stop after the neckline may be an even longer procession of naughts-an infinity of Siberian winter.

Yet do not despair; despair is bourgeois. Instead, memorize every tick of the candle, every shiver of the EMA, and write it all down. Perhaps, decades hence, a fellow inmate will trade you an extra crust of bread for your notes on the day the Doge Army was routed. 🍞🤝

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2025-08-18 17:30