πŸ€‘ Bitwise’s Wild Crypto ETF Circus: AAVE, ZEC, & TAO Join the Madness! πŸŽͺ

Markets

Markets in a frenzy, as always!

Oh, the Absurdity of It All! πŸ“œβœ¨

  • Behold! Bitwise, in a fit of financial whimsy, hath filed with the SEC to unleash 11 crypto strategy ETFs upon the world, featuring such tokens as AAVE, UNI, and ZEC. What folly!
  • These ETFs, in their infinite wisdom, shall invest up to 60% in the underlying token, while the remainder shall be squandered on exchange-traded products and derivatives. A recipe for chaos, indeed! πŸŒ€
  • Lo, this filing doth coincide with Grayscale’s grand scheme to transmute its bittensor trust into an exchange-traded product, as decentralized AI gains traction. The world turns ever stranger! πŸ€–

In the land of crypto, where madness reigns supreme, Bitwise hath approached the U.S. Securities and Exchange Commission with a proposal so bold, so preposterous, it could only be the work of a mind untethered from reality. Eleven crypto “strategy” exchange-traded funds (ETFs) they seek to create, featuring such tokens as aave, uniswap, zcash, and others. What a spectacle!

The N-1A filing, a document of great import, revealeth their plan: to invest up to 60% of each fund’s assets directly in the underlying token, while the remainder shall be cast into the abyss of exchange-traded products and, perchance, derivatives such as futures and swaps. A gamble, most assuredly! 🎲

On the very same day, Grayscale, in a move equally befuddling, submitted a filing to convert its bittensor trust into an exchange-traded product. Barry Silbert, chairman of Grayscale, proclaimed on the platform X that this act reflects the rapid evolution of decentralized AI as an investable theme in U.S. crypto markets. How quaint! πŸ§™β™‚οΈ

Bittensor, an open network of peculiar design, employeth crypto-economic incentives to orchestrate machine learning development, rewarding contributors of models and computing power with TAO. A project of growing fascination, it hath captured the attention of investors seeking exposure to AI-related crypto assets beyond the mundane smart contract platforms. How curious! πŸ€“

Bitwise’s applications, a testament to their boundless ambition, highlight the haste with which issuers are venturing beyond bitcoin and ether, following the triumph of spot ETFs tied to these two behemoths. Previously, they hath introduced spot ETFs linked to bitcoin, ether, solana, and XRP, and hath filed additional applications tied to such assets as sui and hyperliquid. What a menagerie! πŸ¦„

The other tokens mentioned in the filing, though lesser known, are no less absurd: athena (ENA), canton coin (CC), and others. A veritable circus of financial instruments! πŸŽͺ

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2025-12-31 14:31